I’m thrilled to be with you yet again with my Friday Fictioneers story of Alice Pendragon and her adventures, thanks to the photo prompts and inspiration provided by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields at Friday Fictioneers. Check out this weekly challenge here.
This week I’ve written a suspenseful flash. Alice’s father, Kevin, seems to be in trouble. What’s the problem? Where is he? Can Alice and her mother help him? Will they arrive on time?
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The Deserted Path
Our car bumped along the deserted path. ‘Are you sure this is the right way?’
My mother nodded, her lips pursed and her eyes glued to the road.
Above us, dark, heavy clouds loomed as the sun’s last pink-tinged rays faded into the horizon.
‘Will we make it on time?’ I asked. She didn’t answer.
The flash drive he had asked me to bring was hidden in my pocket.
‘What’s daddy doing here?’
A drop slid down her cheek, splashing on the hand that was grabbing the steering wheel with all her might.
Her voice trembled. ‘I don’t know, Alice.’
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All my ‘Alice’ flash fiction written for the Friday Fictioneers Challenge can be read as standalones, but if you’re interested in reading previous stories of Alice’s adventures, here they are!
Rereading Jane Eyre 
Ooo, so many questions ! Good one, Luccia!
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Thank you, Noelle 💖
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Tightly written with lots of qns unanswered, the main driver (sorry) for me is the curiosity – a general feeling of curiosity. – before encouraging and formulating my thoughts into actual worded questions.
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Thank you for commenting 🙂
I wanted to practice with a little suspense. I’m trying to tighten my writing style in my novels, and it’s really making me rethink every single word.
It’s amazing how I thought the focus was on the father and his motives and situation, and for you it was on the mother (Maura). The three have a lot of secrets from each other, and Maura knows much more than she’s letting on…
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That’s Probably why I gravitated towards her… I am glad you were trying to tighten your writing style and the ultimate is flash fiction. Gonna have to lookout for your novels. 😎
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The first three are a historical trilogy set in Victorian England, fir lovers of Jane Eyre, Great Expectations etc. but now I’m writing a contemporary thriller with lots of suspense!
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Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it💖
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Suspense and intrigue masterfully woven. Good write!
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Thank you:)
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Full of mystery! Liked it.
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All those questions you proposed——–and not one single answer! What will I DO?? 🙂
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Read on next week😀 There may be some answers, depending on the photo prompt! Thank you for dropping by and commenting💖
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Nice build up. I’m wondering what’s on that flash drive. You left us thirsty for more. Well done.
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Thank you:) I’ll try to follow up with next week’s prompt.
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Effective at capturing a reader’s interest. Well done.
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Thank you, Eduardo:)
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Dear Luccia,
You leave me with so many questions. Definitely a pager turner. Good job.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you, Rochelle. I’m concerned about how i create suspense in my novel and it’s affecting my flash fiction too:) Hope you have a lovely week💖
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Friday Fictioneers is a great place to practice. 😉
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