Healing Lilly
“How was your day, Lilly?”
Tears spilled.
“Tell me about it.”
“No-one wants to play with me and they call me names.”
“So, what are you doing about it?”
“Crying, mostly. Sometimes hiding. I don’t want to go to school.”
“Lil, listen to me. You’ll get good marks, make wonderful friends, be a great teacher and have your own family one day.”
She stamped her foot. “I’m ugly and silly!”
I held the picture of my younger self to the mirror.
“Look at me, Lil. You can and will do it. Anything you want is there for the asking.”
****
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Lilly or sometimes Lil was my nick name at home when I was a child. My sister couldn’t say Lucy, so she named me Lilly. Elsa died many years ago, and nobody has called me Lilly since, but I know Lilly’s still with me. I encourage her and remind her not to worry and believe in herself, every day. I think it’s working, Lilly is healing and Lucy is happier every day.
We all have hang ups from our youth. Speak to pictures of your younger self, tell her not to worry because it will work out. Believe me, it works. We can heal the child within.
****
This post was written in response to Norah Colvin’s prompt on Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction Rodeo Contest, coordinated and inspired by Charli Mills.You can take part in the contest or just post your flash on your blog, which is what I’m doing.
Norah asks us to cast ourselves back to six years of age, knowing what you do of life in the present; what would you want to be when you grow up and how would you go about achieving that goal? Tell us in 100 words, no more no less. It can be real or imaginary, serious or light-hearted. Extra points for comparing it to your childhood choice, if you remember it.
Geoff Lepard is hosting the challenge this week at his blog. Check it out if you’d like to join in.
Rereading Jane Eyre 
That was lovely, Lil, brought tears to my eyes. I miss my sister every day and she’s only over the pond in Dublin, special bonds never break. X
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What I appreciate about literary art is how even a small format of 100 words can take such a complicated internal struggle, a painful tragedy, and give it the gift of wings. Truth flies even in fiction. Your flash touched my heart and I want Lilly to know I believe in her, too!
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Thank you, Charli💖
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Hi Luccia, Thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m pleased my prompt inspired you to do so; and apologies for being tardy in getting here.
I really love the way you speak to your younger self. It’s very reassuring. Wouldn’t it be lovely if we could really provide that support to ourselves in younger years. But using the opportunity for healing each day is powerful in itself. It’s a gorgeous photograph of you – both!
I’m so sorry you were bullied and that no one would play with you. How difficult childhood was, and is, for so many of us. Sometimes we may think we’d love to return to childhood with its lack of responsibilities, but for many, it wasn’t a garden of joy as is often portrayed. It’s not much fun when illness takes one back as an older adult either.
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I was very shy and insecure at that age, so I was an easy target, but I think I’ve ‘cured’ my younger self, and I really don’t feel as if I was ‘bullied’ any more. My perception has changed and I certainly don’t feel sorry for my younger self.
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What fabulous personal growth, Luccia. It’s a wonderful achievement. Not everyone does as well.
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Thank you, Norah. I don’t know how to explain it or if I’m deluding myself, but as I look back to many moments and events in my life they’re no longer as bad/difficult as they seemed. Right now, I take the good in each minute of each day at a time and try to smother any negativity which comes my way with common sense, optimism and positive vibrations. It doesn’t always work, but most of the time I’m as happy as I choose to be, which is very happy although my life is by no means ‘perfect”. Reading, writing and pushing 60 helps enormously!
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That’s a wonderful achievement and ambition, Luccia. Congratulations. Happiness is definitely a choice, sometimes a difficult one, but one worth making. It is easier in some situations than others too. Thanks for sharing. 🙂
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PS I love your new-look blog. I know it’s been like this for a while, but I haven’t had a chance to visit. Gorgeous! Well done!
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Thank you, Norah💖
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Oh, and just in case you’re wondering. I didn’t get a pingback about this post. Strange.
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Oh dear:( I thought I pinged back. I’ll check it out.
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No worries. I’m pleased I spotted it in my inbox. 🙂 WP should send the pingback automatically.
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You did pingback to Charli’s post, of course. Not to mine. Silly me. I missed it over there. Have caught up now. 🙂
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