It’s Friday, time for another Friday Fictioneers Flash Fiction story with adorable and creative Alice and her incredulous and conventional parents, Marsha and Kevin. Today they’ll be visiting her grandmother’s house, on a sad occasion, or is it?
Thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting the challenge, and Magaly Guerrero for today’s photo prompt, which led me directly to this weeks’ 100-word story.
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Dancing Shoes
Alice rushed down the stairs and flew into the library.
‘Can we move here tomorrow?’ she asked her parents as she slipped on her grandmother’s black, laced shoes and danced around the room.
Kevin’s jaw dropped. ‘Marsha, what’s happening to our Alice?’ he asked his wife. ‘Your mother’s still at the funeral parlour. We haven’t even buried her yet!’
‘Granny wants us to move in at once. I have to look after all her books and manuscripts.’
‘When did she tell you that?’ asked Marsha.
‘Just now. She’s not ill any more. She’s better, that’s why she’s come back home.’
Or
‘Just now. She’s not ill any more. She says she’s sorry, but she had to go.’
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Which ending do you think is best?
I like them both, but I find the first a little disturbing, as if she’s going to remain as a ghost, albeit a ‘friendly’ ghost, while the second is more optimistic. she’s gone to a better place…
All my ‘Alice’ flash fiction written for the Friday Fictioneers Challenge can be read as standalones, but if you’re interested in reading previous stories of Alice’s adventures, here they are!
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Rereading Jane Eyre 
I liked the second ending best because it was less sentimental and didn’t push you into a ghost story
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Thanks, Neil. That’s true, and her grandmother’s memory and manuscripts would be enough inspiration without needing a ghostly presence😀
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Choose your own adventure – Love it!
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Thank you! I wrote the first one last night, but I woke up this morning with the second ending in my mind, so I just couldn’t decide😀
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Dear Luccia,
Given that we already know Granny’s dead, ie at the funeral parlor, I prefer the first ending. I think the second ending would be amazing if instead of the funeral parlor, Granny was still on a ventilator. Anyway, I love the story either way. Alice and her grandmother obviously had a symbiotic relationship.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi Rochelle. I hadn’t thought that she might still be alive. That’s a good idea. It might be nice to keep her granny in the picture, as a physical presence, rather than out of the storyline. Thanks for your insight 😍. I’ll have to think about it.
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Lovely to see Alice again. I prefer the first ending because it is a bit disturbing (at least for the parents), it adds that little extra kick. The second is more conventional, but both work. I guess it depends on where you want to go with Alice and her grandma.
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I like the second ending,
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Thank you for letting me know 🙂
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I like both endings for different reasons. The first ending gives it a creepy punch at the end (creepy for the parents anyway). The second ending is more sentimental and fits a bit better with Alice having to look after the books and manuscripts. Both work and it is a great story either way.
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Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I need to have a good think about my ending 🙂
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I couldn’t decide between the two. Both were effective in their own way. Well done.
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Thank you for letting me know:)
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I think I prefer the first ending. Good story.
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Thank you for letting me know, Clare💖
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Great flash! Am I allowed to say which one I voted for? *whispers* “First ending…”
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Yes, of course you’re allowed😂 Thank you for letting me know:)
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A very nice story. I prefer the second ending. It’s more emotional. Well then, probably ghosts are too. A lovely take on the FF prompt.
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Thank you for letting me know which you prefer. Sooner or later I’ll have to make a decision…
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No matter what the end is, memories and the love of grandma will still remain.
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I preferred the first ending, as I like the idea of a benevolent ghost around the place. At least I hope she is and giving Alice all those tasks doesn’t mark granny out as a harridan. Love the scene you drew here.
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Thank you. That’s what I was thinking too, but then I had doubts.
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